We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
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