can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
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