I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
