He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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