It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
