I'm lost and stupid without you.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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