but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
