so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
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