i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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