Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
