he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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