Joe is yelling at the trees again.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
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