Non-Jews are for practice
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
