My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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