i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Randomize
