Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
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