Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize