Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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