You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
