it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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