Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
