i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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