And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize