walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Randomize