Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
