Whoa Z and x make the same sound
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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