He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
