turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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