I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
