Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
