don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
