You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Randomize
