next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Randomize
