I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Randomize