Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
