Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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