He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
