Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
