So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I just googled if crying burns calories
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Randomize
