Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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