We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
