it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
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