I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
