yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Randomize
