physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
