Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
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