I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Church boner. Awkwardddd
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
