i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
