I wanna bring you to show and tell
I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Randomize
