Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Randomize
