ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I will be naked everywhere
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
